A Top Ten Memoir: 1980 - "Next phase, new wave, dance craze, anyways..."
In February of 1980 I turned 17. My mother threw me a birthday party to include my friends and family. I’ve got a great video of this event because it features my then friends John J., Willy, and John D. interacting with my brothers, my sister, stepfather Ray, my Aunt Therese, Uncle Charlie, and Busia, who would pass away several months later. It’s a rare blending of my worlds at the time.
In September of 1980 I began creating weekly Top Ten lists of favorite songs – something I still do to this day. I decided WDNP, my fictional radio station with its own weekly Top 40 list, was at its end. Why create a fictitious radio station? Why not just list my favorite songs each week? Who cares what Billboard said? My list would also be completely devoid of any modeling from what the other charts were doing. I could include non-hits and album cuts. Anything that was my favorite that week could earn a slot. This would be a list that truly reflected the music I liked.
By the same token, my friend John J. would always ask me why I made up my weekly “Dinip” lists. (His term for DNP.) He wondered how it was helping me reach my goals. Goals? What goals? John was pretty committed to weightlifting and planned to go to college and study medicine. I didn’t have any hobbies besides my fantasy worlds which had, for the most part by this time, begun to evaporate as I now had friends to spend time with. Career-wise I was still uncertain. It was either going to be psychology or communications as a college major.
I’d been inspired by the psychologists and counselors I had experienced in my life: seeing Mrs. Heath in junior high, watching Bob Newhart on The Bob Newhart Show, and the big film release of 1980, Ordinary People, directed by Robert Redford and starring Mary Tyler Moore, Donald Sutherland, Timothy Hutton, and Judd Hirsch. Hirsch played the therapist that Hutton’s high school character Conrad goes to see. Their scenes were so moving that I wanted to become what Hirsch was. I wanted to help young people struggling just as I had struggled and been helped. I wanted to be there for people. So, psychology was winning the major battle.
One possible major, astronomy, lost the battle that year. In the Fall, as I entered my senior year, I began taking the course which was my sole reason for taking physical science and meeting Mauro the year before. All of the fun I had in that previous course was gone as Mauro wasn’t interested in astronomy and didn’t take the course. Within a few short weeks, having no friends in the 8 AM course, I dropped it.
This left me with an interesting class schedule having one at 9 AM followed by a two-hour break and then a few afternoon classes. John D. had a similar break so we would take off and visit Randhurst, one of the nearby indoor shopping malls. We thought it was cool to be having lunch there while everyone else was cramming science and math courses. John and I often did things together during the day.
During junior year, we had the same lunch period followed by Algebra 2. We’d take turns eating at each other’s houses and then proceed to arrive late to the class. Algebra 2 was fun though, filled with cheerleaders who would ask questions like, “How is graphing a line gonna help us in life? I’m sure. Like I’d be working as a secretary and my boss would go, ‘ok now graph this!’” We laughed very hard at that one! The purpose of math was a mystery at the time.
It was a fun period with John D. that didn’t last long though. By Fall, John and I were seeing movies regularly on Tuesday nights. One week in September I decided I’d rather see a school soccer game. Mauro played soccer as did other boys who I felt were much cooler and open-minded than the football jocks who seemed to be nothing but a big clique that was ever impossible to penetrate. The soccer players were more laid back and nicer. John wasn’t particularly interested in soccer so my stepfather Ray offered to take me to a game. Afterwards, John refused my calls and wouldn’t talk to me in school. Apparently, I had rejected him for this other world. Later that Fall, I tore ligaments in my foot during gym class and wound up in a cast. This would usually mean getting out of class early and having a friend walk the gimp to the next class. However, John seemed uninterested in the task. When I told him he didn’t have to do it, he quickly handed my books back to me and I hobbled out of the room on my own. This proved to be the end of our friendship forever.
As a bit of a “punishment,” sometimes John J., Eric, and I would “vandalize” John D.’s car while he worked his job at Osco Drug. Nothing about it was particularly bad unless you consider putting fishing wire all over the inside of someone’s car, so they feel “webs” when they got in, as a crime. It was all pretty innocent. I never saw John D. again after high school, except once in passing. I found out many years later that John died of a failed heart condition in his late twenties after attempting to change a flat tire outside a mall department store.
Another loss in 1980 was Willy who moved with his family to Boone, North Carolina. Willy was always a lot of fun to do things with. He’d try to get me to go jogging with him but I couldn’t stand the activity. He loved music and, as I previously mentioned, we went to concerts together. That year Billy Joel toured with his Glass Houses album. With so many hit songs, including three that made my Top Ten, You May Be Right, Don’t Ask Me Why, and It’s Still Rock and Roll to Me, this was definitely my year for Joel. Friends like Willy, Eric, and John J. also enjoyed his work and we spent a lot of time talking about and listening to his music. We’d joke about lines like “You may be right, I may be crazy, but it just may be a lunatic you’re looking for” in You May Be Right and in It’s Still Rock and Roll to Me: “what’s the matter with the crowd I’m seeing? Don’t you know that they’re out of touch!”
I hardly felt that way though. On the one hand, the loss of John D. and Willy as part of that inner crowd felt like a bit of a hole had opened back up in my life. However, that hole didn’t last long as I began my first big out of school activity: working.
By the Fall of 1980, most of my friends had some kind of job. I was usually resistant to working because I didn’t like people telling me what to do (!) and the thought of some of the jobs available out there was just too anxiety-inducing for me (although I didn’t understand that until years later.) I was finally convinced by my parents and friends to apply for a job as a stock boy at Walgreens. I showed up wearing a t-shirt but still managed to get the job. While I hated the idea of having to be there for my mere twenty hours a week, I quickly found it to be a source of great socializing. Unlike school where cliques still existed, working broke those barriers. Everyone was there for the same drudgery. I was feeling okay about it. As Kenny Loggins would sing about in his big hit from the film Caddyshack that year, “I’m alright, nobody worry about me.”
It was an exuberant song which generally reflected some of the good times I was having, particularly on inventory day at the store. Everyone would be there and it felt like a party to me. One fellow worker who was also a Palatine High School student but a year younger than me was Michelle. I became quick friends with her. She had a great laugh and very positive, fun attitude. She was very pretty and had a lot of guys hot for her which, I had hoped, made them jealous when I’d walk her home from school. Michelle also knew Mauro which opened up that circle a bit more. Another Walgreens employee was a girl named Chris who I kissed on my brother Jeff’s waterbed. This was my first “real” kiss and it felt strange and overly wet….but it allowed me to boast about the opposite sex for once.
By New Year’s Eve, I felt confident enough to throw a party which would include some of my Walgreens friends as well as Eric, John J., Mauro, Liz, Michelle, and her friend Paula. It was a bit of a triumph for me during my senior year to finally feel cool enough to warrant a New Year’s Eve with friends. Not to mention I was off school AND Walgreens, having to bow out of work due to my foot injury. Life was good!
To explain the rest of my Top Ten that year, well, most of these songs were big, big hits. Barbra Streisand released one of her most successful albums ever with Guilty in 1980. The vocals were stellar and the Bee Gees’ Barry Gibb, who served as producer and co-singer on various tracks, gave the diva one of her most contemporary sounds. I preferred the title track and Promises, a song which asks, “are you close enough to take me to your paradise or am I going down to my loneliness? Could you be loving me more or less?” I was feeling pretty confident with these new friendships but there was always a sense that they could be gone at any time. I’d have enough friends disappear from my daily life in my first 17 years to know that this was surely a possibility. Something felt different about this new group though. Their “promises” as friends felt like they’d offer more long-lasting relationships. I didn’t feel “guilty” about the end of my friendship with John D. though. It seemed like these people were taking me in a new direction (“a highway to the sky!” as Babs sang) that he didn’t want any part of.
Country had replaced disco as the new movement in pop music due to the John Travolta/Debra Winger movie, Urban Cowboy, released in 1980. As a result, songs like Eddie Rabbit’s Drivin’ My Life Away proved to be major hits that were catchy and filled with driving beats. I wasn’t making a permanent move toward country but letting it in bit by bit as radio stations were.
Another big genre appearing on radio was New Wave music which combined elements of punk, early 60s-inspired guitar oriented rock, and then often a strong dose of a synthesizer. The Pretenders was a band that dabbled in many of these elements. Brass in Pocket was a big pop hit that featured quirky words like “got new skank, it’s so reet.” I had no idea what they were singing about but the chorus featuring, “I’m special, so special, I gotta have some of your attention. Give it to me!” was pretty clear! I always tied New Wave music to Mauro, since he was the one that really introduced me to tunes, lyrics, and artists that were more offbeat. In retrospect, I realize that I was also quite attracted to Mauro. Anything he was into, I wanted a part of (like watching his soccer games.)
Billy Joel’s It’s Still Rock & Roll to Me pondered this “new” music as “hot funk, cool punk, even if it’s all junk, it’s still rock and roll to me.” He also delves into the changes in fashion with a mention of “bright orange pair pants.” Mauro was known to dress any way he wanted including, on at least one day, wearing a bright yellow pair of baggy pants.
Even Linda Ronstadt’s 1980 album Mad Love was infused with punky new wave sounds that added an edge and freshness to her music. I Can’t Let Go was a big emotional rocker with lines like, “Feel so sad baby. Oh, it hurts me, when I think of how you love and desert me. I’m the broken-hearted toy you play with. You got me going, I need you baby, I want your love, I can’t let go.” Was this emotion directed at Mauro? Perhaps. He was inconsistent as a friend. Sometimes he wouldn’t commit to social outings. Sometimes it was hard to reach him. That year I missed him terribly when he went back to Italy to visit his relatives for most of the summer. I hadn’t heard from him when he first got home but instead ran into him at Walgreens. His tan, punky hair, built-up body, and carefree attitude did something to me. I couldn’t express it at the time, but I was obviously feeling something strong for him. We re-established our friendship but I wanted him around more than I really knew.
Perhaps on some level this might explain The Pointer Sisters He’s So Shy as my number one song of the year. Mauro was anything but shy though. There’s so much more to this great pop song though that reflects what was going on inside me as I looked at other boys: “He’s so shy. SO good-looking! ‘Cause he’s really got me going! That sweet little boy who caught my eye.” Mauro, and many other boys, were SO good looking. They did get me going although I still didn’t understand what it all meant or how to act on it. I was still about a year away from truly understanding what those lines meant to me personally. The Pointer Sisters made the emotion seem fun. The yearning was not nearly as desperate in this song as others. I also hadn’t really thought a lot about the fact that I liked so many songs sung by women. These were popular Top 40 hits and I loved the Top 40. Yet there was something about the female perspective singing about men that struck a nerve (as it often does for us gays.)
He’s So Shy became the first number one song on my weekly Top Ten on Sept. 27, 1980. It remained there on and off for five weeks. This became noteworthy in the first few years of that list because other songs rarely stayed at number one that long. This sprightly Pointer Sisters tune really reflected the positive energy I was now experiencing in Palatine. It was upbeat, had a great chorus, and some awesome Grammy nominated vocals. So, when it came to finally compile my Top Ten songs of the year, He’s So Shy was a no-brainer as my number one of the year.
This list was created, by the way, when my friend Marlee and I began our Top Ten parties in 1983. We decided to have one devoted to 1979/80. Since I’d already had a Top Ten for the former it didn’t take much work for me to put together this one for ’80. The story of those Top Ten parties and Marlee begins to form in 1981.
Links to my Top Ten of 1980:
Other songs I really like from 1980: Cars - Gary Numan, Come Upstairs - Carly Simon, Mad Love - Linda Ronstadt, All Over the World - ELO, I Can’t Tell You Why - Eagles, Girl U Want - Devo, This Beat Goes On/Switchin’ to Glide - The Kings, Them- Carly Simon, Him - Rupert Holmes, Boys in the Back Room - Melissa Manchester, Girls Talk - Linda Ronstadt, Freedom of Choice - Devo, Dreaming - Cliff Richard
What are you favorite songs from 1980?
Next Up…1981…”The best things in life…”
So ... while putting together my 1981 list, I realized I never posted my 1980 list. So I come to this page and see that Frank has posted his list so now I know I'm really late. By the way Frank: very nice list!!!
Ok better late than never and never in any particular order
Another One Bites the Dust - Queen
Hit Me with your Best Shot - Pat Benatar
Keep on Loving You - REO Speedwagon
* This was the song that my class wanted for our prom theme but because of the line "I don't want to sleep, I just want to keep on loving you" the nuns (I had to go to a Catholic HS), vetoed the song. I've no idea what the stupid theme ended up being but it wasn't the song we all wanted
It's still rock n roll to me - Billy Joel
Same Old Lang Syne - Dan Fogelburg
* This song still gets to me
Against The Wind - Bob Seger
* Another one that hits differently each year
9 to 5 - Dolly Parton
* Although I probably didn't appreciate it in '80 as much as I did after getting a corporate job 😅
Out Here on My Own - Irene Cara
Watching The Wheels - John Lennon
I can't tell you why - The Eagles
Runners Up: Three Little Birds - Bob Marley, Games without Frontiers - Peter Gabriel, Wuthering Heights - Pat Benatar, Sequel - Harry Chapin, Lost in Love - Air Supply, Him - Rupert Holmes, Angel Flying Too Close to the Ground - Willie Nelson, I Made it Through The Rain - Barry Manilow
Here are my Top 10 of 1980 in no particular order
Do Right - Paul Davis
Biggest Part of Me - Ambrosia
Steal Away - Robbie Dupree
Wondering Where the Lions Are - Bruce Cockburn
Shining Star - Manhattans
More Love - Kim Carnes
Jojo - Boz Skaggs
Real Love -Doobie Brothers
Guilty - Barbra Streisand and Barry Gibbons
Suddenly Olivia Newton-John and Cliff Richard
Also big for me that year:
Funkytown-Lipps Inc,
Twilight Zone/Tone-Manhattan Transfer,
Xanadu-Olivia Newton-John,
That Girl Could Sing-Jackson Browne,
Passion-Rod Stewart,
Hey 19-Steely Dan,
I Need Your Lovin’-Teena Marie,
Another One Bites the Dust-Queen
Cars-Gary Numan
I Can’t Tell You Why-Eagles
Too Hot-Kool and the Gang,
I Can’t Tell You Why-Eagles
On the Radio-Donna Summer